fantasy

listening to Earshot (as opposed to earshot or earshot (among others) and seeing that some amazingly beautiful eyes belong to bindyree, I've got little time for another entry and find that deep inner longing for someone to combine this love (addiction?) of public writing with an ephemoral package (huh?) or at least merge the life offline with the written gardens online (who could possibly fulfill all of my wants and lusts and ego trips and party hats and boxer shorts and mazes and wigwams (what?... you want linkage to everything?... maybe someday if you know the way) with wonder and excitement as never before while appreciating my rages and perversions and depressions and warps for the artistic chaos that it all might be from the right perspective...

he might, and others who know they are part of the heart that beats here... and there... and everywhere (yeah)... you who've been here so long and took the time to read from the beginning as I came to you lost in sleepwritings in the hope to find a little comfort, a smile, a touch of reassurance, and some shelter from the storm...

random thought interjected randomly for this random day (as opposed to that one, I suppose): more and more I want to move to Seattle... if only it was tropical...

and new and old wonders and inspirations, close and far and away, energy linked and lonked throughout this diary (so many more I now, right now, trust to understand that you all could not be linked in this entry because I have not that much time, no matter how cute you might be) kept me breathing even in the deepest sleep... and others... and more...

and when I wake up alone wondering who will ever truly understand all of me, I think of you... and when I wonder if anyone will actually come anywhere close to helping me fulfill my deepest wants, I hope for a friend... for that is what a friend does... a true friend who wants most of all your true happiness... and I hope, for there is always hope...

knowing I've got to get some sleep because there's work tomorrow leaves me wanting, repressed, damned for all time, at least for the moment...

or should I cut the dramatics, forget the excuses?...

I still do not think anyone ever truly understood me...

every link is just another beginning, another step in another direction, another exposure, another reflection, and if you care to take a closer inspection, face fear of rejection, deeper introspection, you might enter the maze and see only light haze or darkness, it is anyone's guess...

fantasy: she will read every word and hunger for more, with baited breath lay her soul at my door and be mesmerized by the depth of eyes to be found behind the screen, does anyone know what I mean?...

if I had the time to tell you all the stories in my head with and without experience I know you'd know alive and dead the breath of infinite imagination daring addiction to the sensation of feeling the creative flow that only madness leads or genius know...

fantasy: she will run to me with legs that fly and chase my right into the sky and take the lead from time to time for we've got energy to rhyme... settling for nothing less than her best extreme muscles glistening in the sun as she knows how to run for the life and the fun and the passion beyond the twenty fifth mile, and then we will smile...

sleeping passion aches to wake I pray my life will not forsake the magic wonder of my anima as purpose meets master and reason meets rhyme without compromise the world moving faster turns seasons sublime at higher energy levels and consciousness there is deeper meaning and fuller happiness if someone could know what is being and seeing this true then maybe there's hope for the meeting between me and you...

fantasy: she will reach within my heart to find the passion that I left behind and hear my voice and beg for more, as if singing to her was what I was for and we find the answer to everything as life becomes the song we sing...

she was all I ever wanted needed longed for lived for died for before any innocence was lost and eat the cost to get back there again... she was everything I dreamed of to be my one and only true love forever and ever together eternity was just the beginning for we... and I see her face every time I close my eyes and I feel her breath upon my skin... and I see her body shine with strength and vigor as each moment we begin... muscles gleeming soft and svelt in my embrace... she sits in the palm of my hand... thirty miles we run and feel the passion of the chase... she melts in the palm of my hand... skin tight skin shows every stretch of muscles in her buttocks as she takes the lead and laughs a challenge back at me... wrapped in her compression air explodes with my obsession with her energy and the sight I see when she looks at me... only she could ever understand... I live to love her at her command... love at first sight, passion, lust, unconditional trust with no doubt she is all I'm about my way in my way out I must cry, scream, yell, shout...

fantasy: and finally having enough of the chase she leaps into my arms, wraps her legs around my waist, with one hand I stroke her hair, with the other I hold her there and feel her passion pulsing through her skin into my hand and back again... she sits in the palm of my hand... she melts in the palm of my hand... she is the only one who understands my fantasy is in her hands...

candora

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NOTE: Due to excessive comment SPAM, comments have been turned off... ironically, this month is the renewal for supergold membership and the comments feature... bad timing... you know how much I love feedback, so maybe there's be comments again one of these days... until then, please leave a note... thanks J