be random
what is now
when is then
where is email
who i am
how it is
why it is
leave a note?
share me, share you
make me smile
thank you

other journals
(of course I should be sleeping)
(what's life got to do with it?)

about me
(too much to know at once)
friend?
(tic tic tic, toc)

BE MY GUEST (BOOK)

<< MISSING �SOMETHING? >>
the bottom line
who can
when i had the time
the first of december (has another song)
what i do





RINGS 'n THINGS

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< ? As You Wish # >
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published


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�2015 CANDOR COMMUNICATIONS
IF YOU WANT TO USE THE WORDS
FOR ANY REASON
TALK TO ME

MONOLOG

I am here...

I am here
inner silence
always waiting
always hoping
always wanting something more

I am here
without violence
always wishing
always hungry
always ready to be sure

but the world has taught me how to laugh at love and
how to cry at silly things
and experience has shown me how to embrace pain and
forget how to play heart strings
in the quiet moments of darkness the night asks me what happened to
the song my heart sings and the love it used to bring

I am here
inner silence
mostly sleeping
mostly numb and
mostly feeling mostly dead

I am here
an appliance
without reason
without pleasing
all the dreams inside my head

for this life has taught me how to be suspicious and cold
and experience has taught me how to shut down and grow old
in the quiet moments of darkness the night asks me what happened to
the dream my heart lived when my love was so bold

I am here
inner silence
slowly drowning
semi-frowning
even clowning for my fans

I am here
self-reliance
hidden so well
no one can tell
no one knows who I am

for this life has taught me reasons to give up on my dreams
and experience has given me enough challenge it seems
in the quiet moments of darkness the night asks me what happened to
the faith my heart knew when knowing what love means

I am here
inner silence
always repeating
and self-defeating
lazy, non-competing now

I am here
faintly smiling
sloppy styling
final miling
gradually forgetting how

for this story has no ending without finding love again
and this life has no meaning without finding a best friend
in the quiet moments of darkness the night asks me what happened to
the soul my heart always knew as my journeys end

I am here
inner silence
forgetting
remembering
forgetting again

I am here
don't remind me
please remind me
someone find me again

nothing ends
and nothing starts
maybe falls apart
in the quiet moments of darkness when faith is science the night asks me
what happened to my heart

and then I pondered as I was writing a letter to anabliss... is that the song that never ends that Shari Lewis used to sing about? (is that irreverence attempting to sidetrack, distract, or simply lighten the load or mood or something like that?... rhetoric questions, especially rhetorical questions in parentheses... it's a habit, a pattern, a message of sorts... understand?)...

candora

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NOTE: Due to excessive comment SPAM, comments have been turned off... ironically, this month is the renewal for supergold membership and the comments feature... bad timing... you know how much I love feedback, so maybe there's be comments again one of these days... until then, please leave a note... thanks J




I love you all for coming... for reading all these words
for every click feels like more love (I know that sounds absurd)
if I could only tell you... one thing more tonight
I'd say
I wish you could come home with me and be my friends for life


ALL WORDS (C) 2015 CANDOR COMMUNICATIONS