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FAE ah, such a sweet madness, it's a shame to let it go to waste, so even though this was a comment somewhere else, it now becomes an entry here.... because I am way behind... because I am bored in my mind... because life is not always kind... because there's nothing else to find... so now, rewind...
meanwhile, in the real world (or so we like to call the space of physical interactions), I have been wallowing in the serious nonsense of life and rolling around aimlessly in the blahs and blues of darkness, mostly, with an occasional mention in other places... I even considered finally updating the original journal, especially since I took a look at it and it is so scattered and incomplete and that lead me to find so many broken links (or links that were never working in the first place, yet)... but I have been away from there for so long... the mood is a distant memory I forgot to remember... so I think what is needed, before I can actually remember what I forgot, I will have to pass through the seven stages of whatever, including narf, and the silliness beyond, if only to loosen up the screws enough to go home, wherever that is... needless to say (but I'll say it anyway), there will be little or no seriousness for a little while as moving and Sunday mornings are a time for play and praying to the god of lighten-the-fuck-up-already and other such amusing dieties... hopefully the amusement is shared by one and all (even if you have no idea what the heck I am rambling on about... though I've heard tell some people actually take Sunday mornings rather seriously and I wouldn't want to horn in on their fun, so feel free to celebrate your Sunday morning in any manner that fits... after all, what matters is finding peace and kindness and comfort and home, not how, and besides, everyone is welcome here... in further seriousness (for a brief moment), I hope you are smiling, laughing, giggling, guffawing, or doing something splendidly enjoyable and not choking on your saliva (or anyone else's bodily fluids) as you do it... it is a seriously good thing to hope for... may you have hopes as hopeful... I leave you these timeless words not only to save your soul and emplore your rich friends to support me in the style to which I'd like to become re-accustomed, but also to amuse you and inspire your smile... and mine... and anyone else reading... that would make this day (or any day) worth the trouble of waking up and eating through the leather straps (thank you Emo) or finding the keys to this cell... or that cell... we have many, you know... cells, that is... keys as well... and the well is deeper than any I've found, so listen and you may hear the sound of a bottomless pit swallowing everything and bringing it home, bringing it home, bringing it home to sing... I shall, as you know I intend to, return to continue this monologue portion of our lopsided conversations (if we both babble on at the same time, neither of us would be reading, now would we?) some time when I have more time... although I do slip a few rather delicate razor blades into some of my comments with the sole purpose of slicing through some of life's BS, I hope you did not get cut up too badly by any of them... and I certainly do not mean to bleed on you... truly, you are worth more than you get (even from yourself), so go out and throw yourself a party today, in your pants and heart and head, and wave at the trees (and strangers too) and dance with a rainbow... hugs too. *Selfishly brought to you in the most generous way possible by the Foundation for Altruistic Egocentrism.
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I love you all for coming... for reading all these words for every click feels like more love (I know that sounds absurd) if I could only tell you... one thing more tonight I'd say I wish you could come home with me and be my friends for life |